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      A MERRY HEART 

A merry heart enjoys…

     ...the beauty of
                      a falling leaf,
     a floating cloud,
                 a nesting bird,
         a friendly smile:

    ...the music of
                  a rippling brook,
    a rustling breeze,
                a pouring rain,
         a laughing child.

   A merry heart...     enjoys. 

        Delores S. Baxter
           June 13, 1995

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Just what is a witness for the Lord—
A few hours some weekday night?
I beg to differ with that idea;
Seems to me it involves a complete life. 

Ye shall be witnesses unto me,
Is what the Savior said.
You may not know or intend to be—
But day by day your life is read. 

Of course, at church you’re pious and sweet,
Shaking hands and smiling at all you meet;
But what about when you’re away from there,
Is Christ seen in your life; do you really care? 

The people at work, what do they think?
Does Christ in your life appear?
Do you shun profane and vain babblings,
Yet instruct with meekness and fear?

Or how about in your neighborhood—
As folks view your life, does it say what it should?
The Lord said, Love thy neighbor as thyself.
Are you ever around when your neighbor needs help?

Faith, love, joy, longsuffering—
Just to name a few,
If the fruit of the Spirit is not seen in your life,
Why should anyone listen to you?

When you do speak of Christ, what do you say?
Do you tell how His blood washed your sins all away,
How through His grace He set you free
And made you His child for eternity?

This is the message they need to hear
As they read your life, my friend.
Let Christ be uplifted in word and in deed,
And He will draw men unto Him.

                                                Delores S. Baxter
                                                         1972
 

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                        INVASION 

There’s a strange and ominous phenomenon
Permeating this land.
It latches onto the psyche of one
To alter or even shut down. 

What is this power or source or force
That rapes the mind of man,
And swaps and mixes and mingles the souls
Of any and all that it can? 

Some say it’s a power for sale at a price
To any who it can afford,
While others declare they received it from God—
They believe it’s a gift from the Lord. 

Euphemisms are used in this New Age—
Channeling, psychics, and such—
For the age-old practice of sorcery,
New names to add a new touch. 

Perhaps it’s contrived through the marvels of science
By tapping the waves of the brain
With electronic devices or chemistry;
The effect produced is the same: 

One is a victim; one tries to play god,
Tampering with his fellowman—
Violating, invading, manipulating a soul
Without any permission from him. 

Whatever it is; it needs to be stopped—
Arrested without delay!
For there is no right by God’s law or man’s
Another’s mind to invade. 

                               Delores S. Baxter
                               June 5, 1995

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 Love’s House                    

This is the house that love built,
Love that was born of God—
The love of a father for his children,
The love of a groom for his bride.           

Love that’s beyond the measure
Of monetary worth;
For no price can reckon the value
Of sweat and tears and blood. 

This is the house where love abides
And grows from day to day,
Furnishing peace and  contentment
And joy with grateful praise. 

Not a perfect house by any means
If closely scrutinized—
But a refuge of rest and a shelter,
Secure and warm inside. 

This is the house where love extends
Far beyond its walls—
Inviting, greeting, welcoming
Whosoever calls. 

Reaching, caring, sharing,
Devoid of façade,
A love handed down from heaven—
Love that is borne of God. 

                          Delores S. Baxter
                          March 2,1997

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I’ll tell you a story fateful and true,
A story of might and of valor.
It’s a tale of a team they call the Big Blue—
A tale of the Temple Crusaders.

It began in the fall of seventy-seven
With nine eager young men
And a coach who trained them with no mercy given
Cause he knew the Big Blue could win. 

The first to fall to the mighty Big Blue
Was Gateway from old Bristol town.
Then came Tri-Cities with a numberless crew,
But nine Big Blue men put them down. 

Next was poor Kingsport—Blue tried to hold back;
It was their home court too.
Yet try as we may to keep the score slack
Alas!  a hundred and one to thirty-two. 

Then Greenville and Alpine and Greenville again
Fell one-two-three in a row.
KBCS, Mt. Pisgah, Alpine,
Twice crushed by Crusader’s blow. 

Eleven victories without a loss
Proved Big Blue Number One,
To the regret of other teams in the LECS
Crusaders had done it again. 

So it was off to Bristol for the tournament
For Coach Seiber and his Mighty Men.
‘Twas a strange thing—but of all the teams there
None wanted Big Blue to win. 

That mattered not to Crusader team;
They weren’t about to be stopped.
Elizabethton, Saints, and Porters defeats
Brought Temple home on top. 

Now Big Blue was on its way
To Chattanooga for the State Tournament—
Just a small team from “where?” Tennessee—
Nobody was worried about them. 

Pioneer strolled in—all dressed alike;
This game was in the bag.
This little blue team they had to play
Would be just a bore and a drag.

The other game ended  and the two teams came out
Dribbling and shooting the ball.
What’s wrong coach? one Pioneer shouted out,
They don’t look scared at all. 

When it was time for the game to begin
These five were chosen to start:
There was Tony B, Mister G, Dr. T, and Big Kerry
Followed by Monster Man Mark. 

Delores S. Baxter    (Writtern for Athletic Banquet)

Then an army of fans stood up to cheer.
One Pioneer said, Why are they here?
We hadn’t counted on so much noise
Being made for the other boys. 

The cheerleaders cheered; the fans all yelled;
And Big Blue was going strong
When the horn blew and signaled the half—
Pioneer knew something was wrong. 

This little blue team from Powell, Tennessee,
Suddenly seemed quite tall.
How could Crusaders be ahead at the half
Pioneer couldn’t see at all. 

We don’t understand coach—What can we do?
Hey, help us out; we’re depending on you
To tell us how we can change our plight
And beat this Big Blue team tonight. 

And so the coach said, We’ll get the ball
And stall, and stall, and stall, and stall—
Cause that is all I think can stop
That Big Blue team who’s now on top. 

So the boys did just like the coach said,
And for five or six minutes the game was dead…
Until finally, alas, they caught Blue off-guard
And hit several lay-ups off the backboard. 

But Big Blue came back; they were gaining again
When the whistle blew, and it was the end
Of their chance for the State Championship this year;
But everyone knew Big Blue had been there. 

Crusaders went on to become third in the state—
An honor, high, ‘tis true;
But that title will read Number One next year
Cause they’ve not heard the last of Big Blue.                       

       
THE ENTERTAINERS  

One of the craziest phases these days

Is really no more than a joke—
Stand-up comedians are hired by the church
To give a few laughs to the folk. 

They all gather in to the house of prayer
To be entertained a bit—
Some songs, some verses, a hilarious routine,
And maybe a brief sermonette. 

The fruitful success of the meeting
Each member knows full well,
For back on the job at work the next day
He has a new joke to tell!  

                             Delores S. Baxter
                             June 13, 1995

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    The Individualist

Some people are loners
Who want nothing to do
With the society of other folk,
While many it seems
Need to join with a clic,
Whether friends or family or foe. 

And then there are those
Who equally require
Their quiet time alone
And mingling with crowds
And sharing their lives
With people they’ve come to know. 

But there is coming a time
When one cannot choose
Isolation or blending in—
In the presence of God
He will not be alone,
Yet no one can accompany him. 

For one day each man
Will stand before God
To give account of himself;
And whatever his societal
Preference has been,
He’ll be an individualist then. 

                 Delores S. Baxter
                 June 3, 1995

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        THE LOVE OF CHRIST

The love of Christ constraineth me
    to live for Him each day;
To see as souls for whom He died
    those along my way. 

To break with them the Bread of Life—
    if they’ll partake of Him;
To lead them to the Fount of Life
    to never thirst again. 

To share The Light with one who gropes
    in the darkness of despair;
To bear a burden for someone
    who’s weighted down with care. 

To point them to the dearest Friend
    in heaven and earth; you see,
The love of Christ constraineth me
    to love as He loves me. 

                         Delores S. Baxter
                         April 9, 1996

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      THE MEASURE OF SUCCESS

Raising children can be quite a task
Considering the work, the worry and stress;
And yet what a blessing when your labor is through
To see the results of how God has used you. 

Immortal souls were placed in your care,
And God’s promise affirmed in your hearts:
Train up a child in the way he should go
And from it he’ll never depart. 

A belt or a switch was sometimes applied
With these words sounding through—
I want you to know that this hurts me
Much more than it hurts you. 

The household rules, you strictly enforced,
Striving daily to keep them on the right course,
Teaching right from wrong as you knew best,
Then trusting God to do the rest. 

The results are in; the children are grown—
In their lives your success as parents is shown.
The evidence is clear; your accomplishment shines through
In their love for God, each other and you. 

                                   Delores S. Baxter
                                   December, 197? 

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      THE WORD BECAME FLESH 

Dear Father, I thank you for sending your  Son
As an infant, virgin born:
Son of God and son of man
As Spirit and flesh became one. 

As a youth, astounding the wisest of men
With knowledge hard to believe.
You see, they had not the faintest idea
They spoke with the King of Kings. 

Casting out devils, healing the sick,
Demanding repentance from sin—
As prophet and teacher continuing His work,
While knowing how this life must end. 

As Savior, walking up Calvary’s Hill
For me His life’s blood to give,
Proclaiming that whosoever will
Trust in His sacrifice shall live. 

Now Father, I thank you He’s with you again
Waiting at your right hand:
This Prophet and Priest and King of Kings,
Son of  God and Son of Man. 

                                   Delores S. Baxter
                                   Christmas, 197? 

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     THE WORTH OF A MOTHER 

A mother’s worth cannot be judged
By her children when they’re small.
They sometimes think they could run the world
And don’t really need Mother at all. 

They rebel; they complain; they argue and fret
As though Mother were to blame for everything yet—
Forgetting the times when their sickness and crying
Kept her there by their bedside to the Lord humbly praying. 

In times when the family had financial stress
She’d work all day long in making a dress;
Then half of the time we’d grumble and gripe
Because it was a plaid instead of a stripe. 

It seems no matter how hard she’d try
Our desires were impossible to satisfy.
We were so smart, yet we couldn’t see
When she said, This switching is good for thee. 

But her worth we can see most clearly now
As the years of our childhood we view—
As mature adults we proudly proclaim,
Dear Mother, we truly love you! 

                                         Delores S. Baxter
                                         Mother’s Day 197?

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  To My Husband

I thank the Lord each time I pray
For sending you along my way.
He knew you were the one just right for me;
Our marriage was one He intended to be. 

When I am weak, you are so strong,
Always there to help me along;
Yet in those times when my help you need,
Somehow I’m able to perform just that deed. 

Words can’t explain and nothing can compare
With the love and respect the two of us share.
The kind of oneness we have found
Comes only when by God two have been bound. 

I know that in Heaven our marriage was made,
And I humbly thank the Lord each day;
As I often pause and remember,
What God joined together, man cannot put asunder. 

                                Delores S. Baxter
                                July 27, 196?

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          TODAY

Today…

I saw a little old woman who seemed to be lost;
She carried a small wooden box of clothes.
Confused and bewildered, she muttered and said,
Maybe she’s come for me; I need to go. 

She put down her box beside a parked car,
And started to open the door;
But the car pulled away as fast as it came,
And the little old woman just stood. 

She looked to me and I didn’t know
Exactly how to respond.  I asked,
Where have you come from, and where are you going?
If I could just get there, she’d say. 

Then she picked up the box and went on her way,
Going to who knows where—
If it wasn’t some stunt being staged by a class
Of misguided psychologists. 

There was a time yesterday I would not have left
Without trying somehow to help;
But today it was different, because now I’ve been taught
To doubt my fellowman. 

                                    Delores S. Baxter
                                    March 20, 1996

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          TOO PRECIOUS 

While traveling on the road of life
A stranger came one day,
We’ve made a game of life he said,
And we want you to play. 

O no, said I, for life you see
Is a precious gift from God—
To abuse or use it carelessly,
I can’t.  No, I would not! 

The foolish stranger scorned the thought
That God life did purvey,
Each one, he said, is his own god
In the game of life we play. 

This naïve one just doesn’t know
What fun and thrills are missed.
Each must learn to play the game—
Put that one on the list. 

So the artificer’s wiles began,
And from that very day
He schemed, devised, contrived, conspired
To force this one to play— 

With craft, contrivance, wealth, and stealth;
With stratagem and fraud;
To harass, afflict, deter, perplex—
And pose himself as god. 

But hellish force could not prevail,
Though houndingly conveyed;
The resolved, unchanging Christian
Still refused to play. 

God’s peace maintained through every trial
Contentment in the heart,
Trusting the faithful Creator
With life—a gift from God! 

                                Delores S. Baxter
                                March 6, 1996
 

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               TWO STREAMS 

The mainstream is both broad and deep—
Convenient for a ride.
Its distance spans a nation—
Approached from either side. 

Its basin, soft and supple,
Enticing for a swim.
Its current’s pull, magnetic—
Drawing will and whim. 

Its pollutants, hardly noticeable,
Camouflaged by calm.
Its muddy nature manifest,
Disturbed by any storm. 

Each narrow little rippling brook—
Remote, obscure, passed by—
Together span a nation,
Reaching from side to side. 

Foundation tiled in solid rock—
Sound and resolute.
Current leaving will and whim
To those who will to choose. 

Constituent elements pure and clear,
Distinct in every form.
Transparent nature verified,
Enduring every storm.

                               Delores S. Baxter
                               March 7, 1996

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                         GOD'S GIFT

Away in a manger the Christ-child lay;
    the world hardly noticed that first Christmas day;
But all heaven knew and rejoiced at the sight
    of God robed in flesh that first Christmas night. 

On Calvary’s hill men still didn’t see
    they were nailing Messiah to die on a tree;
But all heaven knew when God turned away
    from the Lamb with our sins on His back that day. 

When the Savior from heaven called, Come unto me,
    the world was too proud or too busy to see;
But all heaven knew and rejoiced  at the sight
    of one sinner repenting and coming to Christ. 

                                                   Delores S. Baxter
                                                   November 3, 1997

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Praise You With My Heart 

I will trust you Lord—
Trust with all my heart,
Lean not tomine understanding—
I will trust you Lord.

I will love you Lord--
Love with all my heart,
All my soul, my mind, and strength—
I will love you Lord. 

I will serve you Lord—
Serve you Lord in truth,
Yes, in truth with all my heart—
I will serve you Lord. 

I will praise you Lord—
Praise with all my heart.
I will worship and adore you;
I will praise you Lord! 

            Delores S. Baxter
            April 10, 1995

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                     GOD’S CREATION 

In the beginning…

God created everything:
The sky, the land, the sea,
And fish and birds and animals
And little things that creep. 

And then God made a man from dust—
Adam he was called;
God brought to him the animals
So he could name them all. 

A dog, a cat, an elephant,
A jumping kangaroo;
A horse, a cow, a tall giraffe,
A little turtle too; 

A bear, a squirrel, a butterfly,
An owl that said, Whoo!  Whoo!
Adam named them everyone
Because God told him to. 

Then God had Adam take a rest
And while he was asleep,
God finished his creation—
A wife for Adam named Eve. 

And God saw everything that he had made,
          and, behold, it was very good…
                     Genesis 1:31

            Delores S. Baxter
            November 20, 1995 

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I have a dog who makes me laugh,
It is so funny to see
His floppy ears and friendly face
When he looks up at me.

He always wants to play with me
And stays close by my side.
Sometimes I put him in my wagon
And take him for a ride.

I have a cat who stands straight up!
He says, "Meow," and begs;
Then he catches his food with his two front paws
While he stands on his two back legs.

After he eats, he starts to purr-r-r-r
And curls up in my lap,
'Cause he gets so tired and sleepy
He wants to take a nap.

I have a squirrel in my front yard
And every day I see
Him gather nuts and berries and things
I think he likes to eat.

He takes them to his little nest
High up in the tree;
Then he scampers and plays around my yard-- But he runs away from me!


I have two birds that fly around,
Going from tree to tree;
Sometimes they sit still on a branch
And sing a song to me.

One day, they built a little nest
Out of twigs and leaves,
And soon there were some baby birds
To take care of and feed.

I'm glad I have so many pets--          
They sure are lots of fun!          
My dog, my cat, my squirrel, my birds--          
I love them every one!          

Delores S. Baxter          
June 27, 1995          
For Little Jeb          

And God created…every winged fowl after his kind; And God saw that it was good, And God made the beast           
of the earth after his kind, and cattle after their kind, and every thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind:           
                                               and God saw that it was good.  Genesis 1:21b,25                                            
 

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Marriage – Made in Heaven                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  To Top

(Originally prepared as a devotional for Kim Bailey's bridal shower in 1982)

Marriage--Made in Heaven         

            Sometimes, the relationship of a married couple is euphemistically described as “a marriage made in heaven,” simply meaning that the couple is perceived to be well-suited for each other and happily married. The truth of the matter, however, is that marriage itself was made in heaven. That is, the very idea of marriage originated with God.

           Genesis chapter two records the creation of the very first human being—a man called Adam. It also records God’s pronouncement, “It is not good that the man should be alone: I will make him an help meet for him.” God then created the beasts of the field and the fowl of the air and brought them to the man, but still there was no “help meet for him.” At that point, God “caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam,” and as the man slept, God removed one of his ribs and formed an “help” suitable for him. When God presented His new creation to Adam, the man remarked, “This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” Genesis 2:24 then says, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh" (God knowing, of course, that future beings would be propagated, rather than created, and would therefore have fathers and mothers). This union was the beginning of the institution of marriage.

The New Testament reiterates, reinforces, and further defines God’s resolve concerning marriage. His plan for young women to become wives is explicitly stated in   I Timothy 5:14. “I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully.” Clearly, it is God’s intent, His expressed will, that young women should marry and become mothers and homemakers. Yes, marriage was made in heaven. It was conceived, implemented, and instituted by The Creator himself.

Having conceived the idea of marriage, God also gave directives for attaining His ideal for marriage. For instance, the guideline for selecting a mate is given in II Corinthians 6:14; duties and responsibilities of husbands can be found in Mark, Luke, Romans, I Corinthians, Ephesians, and Colossians; and finally, principles and instructions concerning women are listed in Mark, Luke, Romans, I Corinthians, and Titus.  Most particularly, Titus 2:3-5 provides a “mini-handbook” for wives.

Titus chapter two says,  “The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.” In these verses, God clearly delineates His instructions concerning women and marriage. He prescribes the method of instructing young wives, gives the message to be taught to them, and reveals the malefic result if they fail to obey God’s plan.

The method of instruction is revealed in verse three. Young women are to listen to and learn from older women who live holy lives, are not false accusers, and are not given to much wine.  “The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women...”  Thus, by both word and example the older, more experienced, more spiritually mature women are to guide the younger women toward God’s ideal plan for their lives. These older women are not necessarily to offer only opinions and personal advice, although that may sometimes be helpful, but rather they are assigned to deliver God’s specific list of requirements. His divine curriculum is clearly outlined in verses four and five. “That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands...”  This is the message which must be taught to and learned by young wives. Each of these eight directives should be carefully considered, fully understood, and diligently applied to comply with God’s plan and achieve His ideal for marriage.  

                                            1)  CONSIDER THE MEANING                           2) UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE                           3) APPLY TO DAILY LIFE
                                                                         (The applications given are typical examples. The possibilities are numerous.)          

Be sober - (sophronizo – self-controlled)

Definition: temperate, quiet, serious, solemn, dignified, somber, calm, sensible, moderate, free from exaggeration, not flitty and silly                   

Comprehension:  Proverbs 9:13 says, “A foolish woman is clamorous” (hamah – disquieted, in an uproar).  By contrast, a wise woman is moderate, calm, self-controlled.

Application: Be calm. Avoid jumping to conclusions. Never make a mountain out of a molehill. If your husband comes in late, don’t complain or nag. Instead, make him feel so welcome and wanted that he’ll be anxious to get home sooner the next time. Wear the “ornament of a meek and quiet spirit,”           I Peter 3:4. 

Be discreet - (sophron – safe;   sozo – to save, to heal, to preserve)

Definition:  careful and sensible in speech and action; wisely cautious; using common sense  

Comprehension: “Discretion shall preserve thee...,” Proverbs 2:11 says. Being careful and sensible in speech and action can also preserve and keep safe your family, your acquaintances, and your possessions.

Application: Avoid gossip and unkind remarks—ESPECIALLY to or about your husband or your children. Never say anything, true or not, which is better left unsaid.   Manage economically.  Don’t buy unnecessary items you can’t really afford. Stretch your dollars even on necessities. Never complain that he doesn’t get you things that some friend gets for his wife, etc. 

Be chaste - (hagios – physically pure, morally blameless, consecrated)

Definition:  morally pure, virtuous, modest, decent, simple in taste or style, not too much ornamented, innocent  

Comprehension:  I Peter 3:2-4 says, “While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.  Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.”  Your moral virtue should be obvious in every way.

Application:  Keep yourself above reproach and always be modest in dress, language, and behavior.  

Be good – (agathos – intrinsically good)

Definition:  kind, friendly, helpful, reliable, genuine

Comprehension: “A good man out of the good treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is good.” Luke 6:45

Application: Be helpful to others. Visit the sick and elderly. Be easy to get along with. Be genuine and sincere in all relationships. 

Be keepers at home - (oikourgos – a stayer at home, one domestically inclined, a good housekeeper)

Definition:  one who takes care of or oversees, guardian, protector, watchman  [at home]

Comprehension:  “She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.” Proverbs 31:27.

Application: Stay at home unless you have a good reason to be away. Keep your house neat and clean (“clean enough to be healthy, cluttered enough to be happy”). Prepare good meals. Keep clothes ready for your family, etc. 

Love your children - (philoteknos – fond of one’s children)

Definition:  warmth of feeling, tenderness, devotion, loyalty, reverence, passion      

Comprehension: “...teach the young women to...love their children...” Titus 2:4.   A mother’s love for her children is not an automatic phenomenon—else God would not have given this instruction. In many cultures, this love is instinctively taught and learned by the handed-down example of loving mothers and grandmothers. In some cases, a mother  may feel a genuine fondness for her children, but still fail to relate her love appropriately.

 Application: Show and Tell.  Show your love by patience (repeated explanations, etc.).   Show your love by interest (bugs, dolls, sports, homework, whatever).  Show your love by availability (by their need—not by your convenience).  Show your love by discipline (consistent, calm, purposeful, with love).   Tell.  Tell your children often how much you love and appreciate them. 

Love your husband – (philandros – affectionate as a wife)

Definition: strength, depth, sincerity, warmth of feeling;   tenderness;   devotion and loyalty;    reverence

Comprehension: “...teach the young women to...love their husbands...” Titus 2:4.  This verse indicates that wives are to learn to love their husbands. At the time these words were penned, marriages were arranged by parents. Most women had little or no say about whom they would marry. Indeed, in some cases they were introduced to the groom and married to him on the same day; and yet, God said that they were to learn to love him. Today, most women choose their own husbands—someone they are “in love” with; and yet God’s word still says to teach them to love their husbands. Scriptural  love is much more than a “feeling”; Scriptural love is a choice.

Application:  WHEN to love him: Always.  I Corinthians 13:8 says that love never fails. You must choose to love your husband at all times because that is God’s plan. Sometimes—when he’s sympathetic, gentle, and sweet—he’ll be very easy to love. At other times, when he’s irritable or thoughtless, you are still to love him anyway—by choice if necessary. The decision should be made in advance so you will be able to react with love to any situation.     

                     HOW to love him: Reverently.  Ephesians 5:33 says, “...and the wife see that she reverence (phobeo – hold in awe; revere)  her husband.” Always be careful to show reverential respect for him, especially before your children and other people.  

                     Helpfully.  Genesis 2:18 says that the wife was made as an help for the husband.  Be his helpmate; it will intensify the bond between you. Become interested in whatever interests him—hand him tools as he works around the house, give moral support, etc.—whatever is helpful to him. Remember, Eve was created to be a help to Adam—not vice versa, for him to be her handyman or “gofor”.                      

                     Patiently. I Corinthians 13 says that love is patient and kind. When he leaves the lid off the toothpaste or splashes water all over the bathroom, love him patiently. Proverbs 10:12 says that “love covereth a multitude of sins.”  Be willing to accentuate the positive and overlook his faults.                                                                                                           Sympathetically. Galatians 6:2 says, “Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”  Compassionately offer him comfort during sickness, discouragements, or problems of any sort.       

                     Passionately. According to I Corinthians 7:4, “The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband...” Verse 5 goes on to say, “Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer: and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.”  Love your husband passionately. If you do not, you are giving Satan an increased opportunity for sending temptation in his path.

                     Show and tell. As you show your love for you husband through reverence, helpfulness, patience, sympathy, and passion, be sure to also tell him often. He needs to hear it just as you do. 

                    WHY  to love him: I Samuel 15:22 says, “...to obey is better than sacrifice...”     If for no other reason, choose to love your husband in obedience to God. It is His requirement, and the thrill of willfully obeying God is a reward in itself. But when you choose to love as God instructed, you will be blessed with a new level of contentment and happiness in your home. God’s plan works! 

Be obedient to your husband – (hoputasso – to subordinate; be under obedience)

Definition: doing what is told;  dutiful;  willing to obey

Comprehension:  Ephesians 5:22-24 says, “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church...Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.”  This idea of submission is not a popular concept today—it is not politically correct. As far back as the 1970s, a cartoon was published which referred to God’s creation of Eve from Adam’s rib. The caption on the cartoon said that woman was not created from man’s head to be above him, nor from his feet to be beneath him; but rather, she was created from his side to be equal with him. Perhaps that was to have been the case. But the fact remains that when Eve was deceived, and subsequently enticed her husband to sin, she was subordinated by the Creator.  “... thy desire shall be [subject] to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee” (Genesis 3:16).  Although that Devine penalty was passed upon all women for all time, wifely submission is hardly practiced at all in the modern world—rather it is ridiculed or denounced completely. Legally, in America, no husband could require submission of any sort from his wife, nor does society expect that he should. Actually, here and now, there is absolutely no reason for a wife to subordinate herself to her husband—apart from her desire to please God. It is still God’s edict—and for a wife, submission to God requires submission to her husband.

Application:  Try to please your husband—whether it’s convenient or not. Be submissive in your heart and in your attitude as well as in your actions. If he is a loving, Christian husband, it should be a pleasure to please him. If he is sometimes difficult and undeserving, you can still take pleasure in pleasing him as you submit for Jesus’ sake. “Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation [behavior] of their wives” (I Peter 3:1). 

            And so...be sober, discreet, chaste, good, keepers at home; love your husband and your children; be submissive to your husband.  These eight commands to women are vital for realizing God’s ideal marriage—one which will bring love, peace, and harmony to the home and glory to the Savior. Titus 2:5 says to teach the young women all these things for a reason— “that the word of God be not blasphemed.”  Your failure to comply with God’s plan will not only cause your marriage to suffer loss of blessing and happiness, but it could also cause God’s word to be spoken against reproachfully by the adversary.  What a malefic result!  

            On the other hand, Proverbs 31:10-31 shows the ideal situation of a woman who applies God's principles in her life and marriage. 

Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands. She is like the merchants' ships; she bringeth her food from afar. She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens. She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard. She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms. She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night. She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff. She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy. She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet. She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple. Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land. She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.  Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.  She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.  She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.  Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.  Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.  Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.  Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.

         This Old Testament description of a “virtuous woman” depicts the very qualities which Titus 2 relates as instructions for all wives. This woman of Proverbs 31 will do her husband “good and not evil all the days of her life.” She is faithful, diligent, loyal, helpful, wise, and kind. Her discreet behavior and respect for her husband contribute to the respect others have for him. She is a woman who fears the Lord and obeys God’s role for her as a wife. Her household is a place of peace, love, shelter and comfort for her husband and her children. Ultimately, the result of her years of faithful obedience to God’s plan is to one day have her grown children “arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.”  What a tremendous and precious reward! Trust your marriage to The Maker of marriage and reap His blessing for yourself and your family.

We serve Jesus by serving others.  Delores Baxter

What man believes about God does not alter God's eternal existence, supreme authority, or righteous judgment.
What man believes about God does determine his own inner peace, outward behavior, and eternal destiny.           Delores Baxter

I will do wrong unless I have purposed in my heart to do right.    Delores Baxter

Your degree of love for a person is revealed by how reluctantly, or how eagerly, you expose his faults to others. Delores Baxter
 

 Respect or Rebellion 

            Practically  every  child  and  adult  is  aware  of   the  familiar   Biblical   edict   found  in Ephesians 6:1, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.” As a matter of fact, most Christian parents have probably cited the verse many times, or at least alluded to it, in seeking to elicit obedience from their children. The same chapter in Ephesians goes on, however, to issue some explicit directives to the parents also. “And ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath....” This command in verse four is in every aspect as imperative to the parent as the command of verse one is to the child, though it may not be nearly as easily understood and implemented. How can parents avoid provoking their children to wrath, and yet at the same time produce in them the obedience which God requires of them, and which their parents are blessed by?

            The first step toward obtaining the desired result is to understand the “wrath” which is to be avoided. The Greek orgizo means “to enrage, to become exasperated.” In English, wrath is defined as "vindictive anger, indignation, resentment, rage."  It is not just the temporary upset which might naturally occur with any instance of discipline or any exercise of  parental control. Understandably, curbing a child’s self-will might well result in a momentary flair up of anger, whether openly demonstrated or just inwardly felt. That brief response is not wrath. Rather, the “wrath” of Ephesians 6:4 involves a lingering, underlying rage—an implacable resentment which remains. This is the kind of debilitating, destructive hostility which Christian parents are capable of provoking in their children, but which they must carefully, purposefully avoid.

The question recurs then, “How does a parent train up a child in the way he should go without provoking him to wrath?” Predictably, children are daily drawn away from “the way they should go” by their own self will and sin nature as well as by peer pressure  and worldly allurements. All the while, parents likely feel pressed for time. They may be distracted by pleasures or distressed by problems and, as a result, become frustrated with their children—justly or not. Some family discord is no doubt inevitable; but it need not result in wrath. God’s Word provides the solution. After warning the fathers, “provoke not your children to wrath,” God continues with the alternative, “but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”

            Children are to be nurtured and admonished.  The Greek paideia relates to tutorage: careful, deliberate, individual teaching and training. In English, the word nurture suggests "caring for, fostering, encouraging."  Christian parents must nurture their children following the example of the Heavenly Father. He consistently teaches, directs, helps, and encourages each of his children with love and patience. This is the example earthly parents must emulate.  They must lovingly, gently mold their children, looking for signs of growth (or even effort to grow), and offer encouragement.  Such nurturing should create a desire for more growth.  It certainly would not produce wrathful resentment.

            In addition to nurturing their children, however, parents are also instructed to admonish them. This Biblical directive might mistakenly be used as an excuse to take every opportunity to yell at children, pick at all their faults, pompously put them in their place, and take out personal frustrations on them.  Such treatment, most likely, would provoke wrath in anyone, especially in immature children and adolescents.  But that is not the admonition of Ephesians 6:4. The Greek neuthesia means “calling attention to; mild rebuke or warning.”  The English definition is similar: "advice, gentle reproof, warning."  Thus, bringing up children in the admonition of the Lord involves carefully advising them from the Bible, showing them their faults in the mirror of God's Word, and warning them of the consequences of wrong choices (based on God’s law of sowing and reaping). Such admonition, if heeded, should produce introspection and repentance. Even if it is ignored or rejected, it should not provoke sustained anger.

            Considering the nature of children, our Heavenly Father knew that occasions would arise when something more than nurturing and admonition would be needed. He advises us in Proverbs 22:15, "Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.” And in Proverbs 19:18, He instructs parents to “Chasten they son while there is hope."

           Obviously then, an essential part of Biblical discipline will include instances of corporal punishment—spankings, if you will.  Seemingly, this would be sure to provoke wrath in a child—but would it?  God gave both instructions—use the rod of correction; do not provoke wrath—therefore, it is possible to punish without causing wrath. God said of His children, “As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten.” (Revelation 3:19)  Biblical chastisement is administered with a heart attitude of love—not one of anger or frustration. Love does not provoke wrath; love strengthens, encourages, edifies.  Thus, chastisement administered with love produces returned love and respect.  Wrongfully administered, however, it may very well produce resentment, rebellion, and wrath. 

Two children exposed to the same degree of chastisement: 

                        One child-

You know, 'twas not the awful stripes
He laid across my back
That placed resentment in my heart
And caused my love to slack. 

Rather 'twas that vengeful look
Of hatred in his eye
That broke my heart and broke my will
To care or even try. 

                        Another child-

You know, despite those painful stripes
He laid across my back
The love for him within my heart
Will never cease nor slack. 

I think it was that look of love
Those tears which filled his eyes
That broke my heart and broke my will
And set my sights on high. 

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath:  but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.   Ephesians 6:4 

                                                                                                Delores S. Baxter
                                                                                                Concord, Tennessee
                                                                                                1978

Which yet my soul seeketh, but I find not:  one man among a thousand have I found; but a woman among all those have I not found.  Lo, this only have I found, that God hath made man upright; but they have sought out many inventions.  Ecclesiastes 7:28-29

 POOR KING SOLOMON 

            Poor King Solomon sounds like an oxymoron; it seems to contradict itself, considering the wealth Solomon was known to have possessed.  But based on his lament  in Ecclesiastes chapter 7, the king appears to have been very poor indeed.  Of all the men in his sphere of  acquaintance, he found only one in a thousand acceptable by his standards; and of all the women in his acquaintance, including the thousand in his harem, he could not find even one.  That is poverty indeed—deprivation of faithful, genuine, trusted human relationships. 

            While the problem with the men of Solomon's circles is not readily apparent, his dilemma with women is quite obvious.  He should not have expected to find one genuine, true, faithful, and loving woman by sharing himself with a thousand women.

In doing so, he not only violated God’s command forbidding a king to multiply wives to himself (Deuteronomy 17:17), but he also violated God’s original concept of and instructions for the husband/wife relationship.  In Genesis chapter two, when God instituted marriage, he said, "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife:  and they shall be one flesh." 

Who could be closer to a man than his parents who had reared him, taught and trained him, advised him, nurtured him, loved him all his life??  And yet, God said he was to leave those closest to him that he might cleave to his wife.  Trying to cleave to them and to her wouldn't work.  He could still love them, share time with them, converse with them, even seek advice from them, but he could cleave effectively to only one. 

God even went so far as to say that the husband and wife would become one flesh—the two of them become one.  Poor King Solomon never found one woman because he never sought one; he sought a thousand.  God did not say, "Cling to your wives;  a thousand and one shall become one flesh." 

No, the marriage bed is sacred.  It is intended for one man and one wife, and that is the only way any man can gain the wealth of uniting with one woman who will become everything to him that he needs—“an help meet for him." 

Poor King Solomon—there were probably many faithful women within his province fully satisfying the needs and desires of their own beloved husbands, but Solomon could not find one. The wealthy king violated God’s edicts and robbed himself of the opportunity and joy of knowing one woman.

            Solomon evidenced the truth of his own statement, "God hath made man upright; but they have sought out many inventions."  Yes, God made a man, and then made a wife for him.  Solomon, not content with that arrangement, sought out his own convention:  one man--one thousand wives.  Poor King Solomon!                  

Delores S. Baxter            Andersonville, Tennessee          January 2, 1996 

Scripture References: 

Prov 21:1-2
The king's heart is in the hand of the LORD, as the rivers of water: he turneth it whithersoever he will. Every way of a man is right in his own eyes: but the LORD pondereth the hearts. 

1 Kings 11:1-10
But king Solomon loved many strange women, together with the daughter of Pharaoh, women of the Moabites, Ammonites, Edomites, Zidonians, and Hittites; Of the nations concerning which the LORD said unto the children of Israel, Ye shall not go in to them, neither shall they come in unto you: for surely they will turn away your heart after their gods: Solomon clave unto these in love. And he had seven hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred concubines: and his wives turned away his heart. For it came to pass, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned away his heart after other gods: and his heart was not perfect with the LORD his God, as was the heart of David his father. For Solomon went after Ashtoreth the goddess of the Zidonians, and after Milcom the abomination of the Ammonites. And Solomon did evil in the sight of the LORD, and went not fully after the LORD, as did David his father. Then did Solomon build an high place for Chemosh, the abomination of Moab, in the hill that is before Jerusalem, and for Molech, the abomination of the children of Ammon. And likewise did he for all his strange wives, which burnt incense and sacrificed unto their gods. And the LORD was angry with Solomon, because his heart was turned from the LORD God of Israel, which had appeared unto him twice, And had commanded him concerning this thing, that he should not go after other gods: but he kept not that which the LORD commanded.

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